Tino La Bamba is an explorer. With his latex suit, golden trumpet and mean wheels, he’s biking from Sydney to Lismore. Why? Dunno.
Tino La Bamba is an explorer. With his latex suit, golden trumpet and mean wheels, he’s biking from Sydney to Lismore. Why? Dunno.

Biking to Lismore in latex

Sydney cabaret artist Mark Shorter is taking his latest theatrical performance to, well, the highway.

In his guise as the Great Tino La Bamba, he’ll ride from Sydney to Lismore on his trusty motorised steed, Platanito.

This performance journey is a burlesque moped adventure. It’s Easyrider meets Don Quixote. He starts from the Red Rattler in Marrickville, Sydney, on Saturday, December 5. The performance goes for a week as Tino travels the New England Highway to his final destination, that great modern city and cultural centre, Lismore.

His mission is to reclaim his brother’s honour, which was violently compromised after a night of debased group sexual activity with the local rugby league team. (It was a Sydney football team of course. That sort of behaviour would never happen in this morally upright region.)

His journey will take seven days as he stops off at the towns of Wollombi, Singleton, Tamworth, Armidale, Glen Innes and Tenterfield. It’ll culminate with a show at Lismore Regional Gallery on December 18, at 6pm.

La Bamba’s journey will indeed be a perilous one. And his journey raises many questions:

Can this man withstand the heat of the greenhouse-enhanced Australian summer in his latex body suit?

Will his moped be able to cross the steep inclines of the Great Dividing Range on his 800km journey to Lismore?

Will the people of the bush accept a cabaret creature in fur-lined thongs from the dark depths of Sydney?

There’s only one way to find out. Follow Tino La Bamba’s amazing journey on www.tinolabamba.com.


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